Thursday, September 02, 2010

Loving cloud nine, my head's in the sky, I'm ridin' solo

Traveling solo has simultaneously provided some of the most depressing and most rewarding experiences I've had. There is much to be said for a journey where you control so many of the variables of traveling. The downside is a journey where you don't have that easy comfort of loved ones nearby.

I've been stationed overseas with only work colleagues for company a few times now, but I don't really classify this as solo travel. After all, your control is limited and you do have colleagues (Not exactly loved ones, but close). So holiday wise, I’ve only done a grand total of two, but here are some of my thoughts on the matter.

Meeting People:

The number one fear of traveling solo (Well at least my number one fear) is the fear of being alone for a long period of time. Some people are excellent at meeting others and then you have people like me. These are my tips for meeting people on holiday.

If you’re hot, just hang around, someone will chat to you. For the rest of us, you need to be an active hunter. If you see someone else who is by themselves, go and chat with them. This sometimes works out and sometimes doesn't. I don't actually remember all the people who turned out to be losers, incapable of speaking English, though I know there were plenty. There are two ways I like to meet people. If it’s a formal activity, the old ‘going up to someone and sticking your hand out with a smile’ trick works pretty well. If I’m just wandering around various attractions, I try making an observation whilst near someone I want to get to know and then see how they respond. Leave those who don’t respond and pursue those who do want to chat with you.

Avoid couples. Perhaps it’s my luck, but many couples are terribly self-involved people. It’s not that they don't like you, it’s more they are more interested in spending time together than meeting new people. Couples are also far less likely to ask you to join them for other activities later.

Pre-formed groups are tricky. That big rugby group could be a godsend with a bunch of fun people or a complete nightmare of bigots. Groups that are formed for an activity however are gold. Everyone is trying to have fun and often the organizers deliberately set you up to talk to new people.

The usual laws of meeting new people apply. Smile heaps; ask lots of questions about them, keep it light etc, etc. I find a mixture of discussing what you're doing and discussing about their lives keeps things from getting too superficial or too probing.

What to do:

What you do is entirely up to you. It’s your holiday after all. I like to get a mix of culture, outdoorsy and indoors attractions, but plenty of people I know see travel as an overseas pub crawl. Whatever floats your boat. Make sure you have a list of ideas, but not an itinerary when you travel.

I would suggest that you leave the scenery stuff till last. Try and select activities you know are likely to have lots of people. Little aside: ask ahead about the tour, sometimes you don’t want to be the only person doing it. I once went horse riding in NZ hoping to be part of a riding group and it ended up being just me and the (admittedly very cute) instructor.

Where to stay

This isn’t a competition. The best place to stay is hostels. I always go for the largest mixed dorm I can find. It’s not only damn cheap, but you have a better than even odd of meeting a good mix of girls and guys. The hostel-world website is totally brilliant with its ratings and easy bookings.

See if you can get the hostels which have included breakfast (even for a nominal amount). Firstly, it’s typically much cheaper than at a cafe, it’s typically open earlier than anywhere else and it’s (again) the best way to meet people in the mornings.

See if the hostel organizes any kind of tours.. Typically a good hostel has various activities, sometimes free or often it will provide a discount. Sometimes it’s in conjunction with other hostels in the area, so even if you made an error and picked a quiet hostel, you can meet folks from other hostels. In Paris, the hostel (St Christopher’s) that I stayed at, arranged a free and excellent walking tour around Paris.

Beware of:

This may be pointing out the obvious, but be wary of high danger activities. You don't have a friend to dig you out of trouble and even simple things like losing your hostel pass can ruin your holiday. Let me clarify. Jumping out of a plane isn't a high danger activity. (Think about it, you have two concrete outcomes, land safely, or die horribly). In this and most high adrenaline activities, you're with other people, typically a qualified instructor who has a duty of care over the group. No, by high danger, I mean situations where you are by yourself with no one to look after you. For example, I was driving from Auckland to Rotorua and I was both tired and slightly hungover. That’s a high danger activity because if I crashed, I wouldn't have friends or family to bail me out (of Auckland Jail if I survived too). To compensate for this, I made it a point to take regular pit stops at safe locations to just rest and get my fatigue under control.

This is all I've gleaned off my relatively small experience. Anyone else have ideas?

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